Feel guilty for watching television.

Hey guys, I hope that everyone had a great summer.  I took the summer off from writing and tried to get some vacation time, although I still had to work.  I’ve typed up some things, I just have not had the opportunity to add some photos to it; but I will post them as soon as I get a chance.  Anyway, back to the original intention of this post.

I’ve been home now for close to three hours and in that time I have cooked a completely homemade dinner (the peas were frozen, but other than that), folded and put away two loads of laundry, washed another, somewhat cleaned my kitchen, helped with homework, ironed clothes for tomorrow, and now am attempting to write a quick blog.  It was 2.5 hours before I was able to wash my face, and I still have on the same clothes that I started my day in.  I did get a chance to change into my house shoes, but that’s as far as comfort goes.  During all of this activity, I could have turned on my television and watched it as a distraction, but something in my mind just wouldn’t let me. 

My husband came home, changed clothes, fixed himself a snack, and went to work in his office; but he has his television on.  Why can’t I work and have the television on?

Is it because I’m helping Babydoll with her homework and I don’t want to distract her?  Nope, she has taken breaks and been outside to jump rope or bounce the basketball. 

So what is it that is keeping me from turning on the television and watching a little of the Cooking Channel? 

I pondered this question as I was folding up towels and it came to me.  I am all about rewards.  I reward my self for all the little task that I do.  If I put all the dishes in the dishwasher, then I can go use the restroom.  Once I eat all my food, I can have my drink (this I know came from growing up with a mother wanting us to eat our food and not get full on the liquids – it still sticks with me to this day).  Once I get the chicken tenders breaded and resting, I can have a glass of water.  Once I get the chores done, then I can finally sit down and watch television.  It’s crazy, I know; but I haven’t figured out how to stop the craziness.  This is why I can’t just turn on the television and while I’m doing things around the house.  If I’m watching television, then I’m not really doing the things that need to be done.  I’m distracted.  I don’t do a complete job, I’m slacking, and you don’t get rewarded for slacking.  This did not come from my childhood, this is some rule I made myself. 

Like I said, this seems to be something a little wacka-do for me and something that I should probably work on fixing; but I think it will have to be something that I consciously think about correcting and do I have time to add something else to my plate? 

Does anyone else feel guilt over turning on the television and watching while they work or am I a solo boat sailing in the sea of television watchers?  I’d love to hear from you.